A poem to begin…
Hello, my dearest reader,
Firstly, I must apologize for getting off my schedule just a bit. My personal goal is to have this little publication out each full moon, or thereabout, each month. Whelp, the last full moon came and went. No newsletter. Life dictated to me what my priorities needed to be. You see, I am a recovering perfectionist, so I surrendered. My surrender, however, doesn’t automatically mean my brain doesn’t stop with the negative self-talk. But, it does present the opportunity for me to reframe my thoughts. Ultimately, trusting I will follow through. Sometimes a little space is what is needed. A little care. Understanding things align in the manner in which they were meant to. Like shifting cycles, grace is a real thing.
So, in preparing to write this piece, I was doing my best to shift my thinking. Trusting also led me to look at where the moon was in the sky…as I write this, it is now the New Moon. The New Moon in Taurus to be exact. I took it as a sign. My little extra care time was well-needed.
Anyway, I decided to look back at my phone, in my photos, sort of zooming out to see what happened over this last month and a half. I like to document the good and the things that are challenging. So, I decided to make a list. Wow. Just wow. So many things were experienced!!!! So much fun! So many good times! But, also, there were many tough days that we got through. Care-taking for an ill loved one is no joke. Especially, when you're the mama to that sick loved one. We lived, enjoyed, struggled, and kept going together, as a family. What I saw and felt consistently, no matter what, was love.
Love holds the space for gratitude to flow. Knowing we’ve made it to—today, no matter, the trials is something.
We are abundant with every breath we take. With every step we take forward, we win. The more we do the uncomfortable thing, the more muscle memory we gain. The more confident we become. Never thought I would become as confident as I am driving my son to his hospital on the south-side of Chicago. But, I am. Our boy is nearing the beginning of the end phases, of his cancer treatment for leukemia. Been at this since last August. And we are still going. It was last year at this time, and his mystery pains began. In reflecting on this journey, what is a reoccurring theme, is attention. The attention I pay to my priorities, my son, his siblings, my husband and extended family, my attention on my faith, in others and in God. It has caused me to really contemplate what makes up my life and the way that I’m living.
Where does my attention go to? Where does my focus land?
A little story…as I was pushing my son out of the hospital yesterday, I was opening a door and sorta struggling to get his wheelchair through the doorway. When a gentleman stopped as he was driving by to ask if I needed any help…I said, “no, that’s ok, I’ve got it.” I heard it reverberate in my mind, over and over…I’ve got it…I’ve got it. And I felt it, I did have it. The confidence I felt. knowing I had it, helped me move through that hard moment. I just knew it. That man noticing, helped me. I felt less alone. We felt less alone. I felt my courage and the resolve to keep going rise up within me. For this, I am overwhelmingly grateful.
So, since it is the New Moon in Taurus…a time to set anew. A time to plant some seeds. We will be in this energy for a few days. So, I’m sharing a New Moon Journaling and Intention Setting Worksheet.
Get yourself comfortable. Sit in a receptive, contemplative state. It may be helpful to do some deep breathing, a little yoga, some EFT Tapping, take a walk, or just anything that makes you smile and relax. Enjoy!
The mantra that’s been making itself known to me is the Moola Mantra. I just happened to stumble upon it. And I have just kept on coming back to it. It has really been such a comfort. That’s the thing with Sanskrit. It’s the vibrational sound, that gets ya, without even knowing the meaning of the words, just pure magic!
So, Moola means base or root. Aum begins the first line, which means the original sound of creation. We’ve covered this syllable in a previous newsletter. Feel free to explore the archive.
Sat, pronounced Sut, means truth. An invitation to let go of misperceptions. Darkness becomes light.
Chit- We are not separate from everything in existence.
Ananda- bliss
Parabrahma- Supreme Being beyond time and space.
Purushotama- Supreme Soul incarnated into mankind
Paramatma- Supreme Being in all things, come into my heart
Sri Bhagavathi- Feminine aspect of Creation, supreme intelligence in action
Sametha-together
Sri Bhagavathe-Masculine aspect of Creation, unchangeable and permanent
Namaha-total dedication of one’s self to God or to one of importance
Practicing this mantra helps us to see our awareness and understand our personal truth. It’s beautiful and calming to listen to. Clear a little time for yourself, close your eyes, and settle in. I made a playlist. Enjoy!
Coffee Talk: aka Real Talk
So, it’s been a very busy Spring. Dealing with all the things…keeping life running, while taking care of our son as he receives his treatments has been really hard. But, answers to questions I’ve asked to the great big mystery in the sky, have managed to make their way directly into my heart. A friend asked me for coffee a few weeks ago at her house. I said yes. I arrived and she has a cute little coffee bar in her kitchen. She directed me to choose my mug at random from her breakfront drawer. I received what was meant just for me.
Heart Happenings:
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In closing, my dear reader, please know, things will get better. You are just right, right where you are. Take your time, go at your own pace. And trust, that you are right on time.
As always, what was YOUR favorite part of today? What are YOU feeling grateful for? Feel free to share any insights from listening to this beautiful Moola Mantra. Or anything else that you’d like in the comments! Thanks for reading!!!
With Grace & Gratitude,
Mary Beth